tired

There are different kinds of tired. There is the mental exhaustion of dealing with difficult problems. The short term burn of completing a big project (VBS comes to mind). The bone deep weariness that comes with infants that won’t sleep through the night. Physical tiredness from exertion. 

And then, there’s us.

Not sure what it’s called when the second you sit still, you fall asleep. WHERE doesn’t matter so much, so long as the surface is horizontal. I have never been a soldier, but I am pretty sure that we approach battlefield fatigue. Given a couple of days off, with no kids, my hero and I would probably sleep the whole time. I know there is a balance between getting everything done and actually resting… still trying to find that balance point. 

Maybe we are overachievers. Maybe homeschooling, sports, church, keeping house with eleven kids, farming, working, AND trying to have a life is kind of a lot. Or maybe the tyrrany of the urgent is pushing us over the edge.

Yesterday at church I was reminded that time is a precious commodity. Once it’s gone, you don’t get it back. Where is my time going? Am I redeeming every hour, using it to the best of my ability? Or just spinning my wheels in a crazy whirlwind? 

These aren’t questions that I can slap down an easy answer for. In my sleep deprived fog, even figuring out WHERE the time goes will take concentrated effort and determination. But it was a good challenge. To discern between urgent and important; to be completely invested in what I am doing at the moment, not thinking of the five thousand other things that I need to do; to live mindful that tomorrow is a hope, but not a promise. And so, the same way I am going through my house and getting rid of excess STUFF, I will be going through my time and trimming the waste there as well. I would love to hear your success stories on making your time count for the important stuff, and how you decided what that was. 

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One thought on “tired

  1. I am learning about this as well. Though I value having things clean and tidy, and training my kids in these responsibilities, I am beginning to realize that when I am old, I am likely not going to think back fondly on the time I spent making sure everything was done. I am learning to let go of some of the to do list and grab hold of the time I do have to build relationships with my kids. Maybe that means we do a job together, but rather than the focus being completely on the task, my focus is on how I can connect with and build up the little person I am with. Maybe that means the job took longer or was not as “perfect” as I would like… I’ve also been thinking about this in the realm of prayer… I may not get everything done, but I know that I will never regret the time I take to spend with the Lord in prayer and reading his word. And I believe that when we allow that communion (with the Lord AND with the kids) to take place in the mess of life, it shows how we value them all over the “urgency” of the innumerable tasks that steal our atttention and energy. Thank you for sharing your life so candidly!

    Liked by 1 person

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