Blessings come through rainbows

It is quiet this morning before the standard mayhem commences. This time of day I have claimed for my own- the dark, calm hours before dawn. Well, mostly calm. There were the three little bottle baby goats that woke up at 4:30 and went tearing around the yard screaming that they wanted their first breakfast. But once we fed their ravenous little tummies and stuck them in the bathtub to warm up because Texas is predictably unpredictable and they were getting chilled…. once all that happened, the quiet was mine again. I am sitting here next to my hero and my littlest one, pondering.

Life really hasn’t slowed down all that much, in a way. My hero is home more- his hours were cut from 80 to 40. So he actually gets these crazy things called DAYS OFF. We haven’t had those since we were married nearly four years ago… well, maybe one here and one there, but never five at a time. Never actually on schedule. And oh, the shenanigans! He bought a bull horn… so that he could wake the kids up. They love it.

I’m awake!

We are also being productive. We have been planning to build a greenhouse for oh, four years or so… now it is getting built. It will be gorgeous. The boys have had some days off of book learning and spent them applying their geometry to real life. Added bonus: I won’t have a jungle in my living room every winter, or a plastic-encased front porch either! I am moderately excited. My smallest person wanted to help, so we gave him a dry paintbrush. Of course he found some wet paint somewhere to distribute.

Style, 2 year old version

Opportunities to serve our community abound; a friend of mine is organizing a drive for face masks for first responders. We have two sewing machines going, one person on the iron and one person cutting…. once we found our rhythm we were able to start churning out some tangible assistance for those who serve and protect us. It had come to my attention that NONE of the fire fighters in our county have any PPE… we can’t have that.

Spring has sprung, and new life abounds. Baby goats and baby chickens are everywhere. Since I have young moldable humans who need responsibility and activity, this is a match made in heaven.

Easter was different this year, of course. No big extended family dinner. No scavenger hunt. We *did* hunt eggs in our yard, even the big kids… one of the boys accidentally-on-purpose misconstrued the term “Easter egg hunt” and brought his pellet gun.

I thought you said we was gonna HUNT Easter eggs!

And last but certainly not least, I got to practice emergency medicine. My bathtub needed drain surgery. No I’m not dyslexic, you read that right. Seems that those small heads on disposable razors sometimes break off when they are dropped in the shower, and sometimes cause massive clogs in bathrub drains… about an hour on a shop vac and with long nosed tweezers, I was eventually able to extract the offending article. I am happy to report that the patient is back to normal. Draining well.

Excuse the ick… lack of drainage leaves a nice scum

Successful surgery

Who knows what adventures this week will hold? One thing for sure, it will be unexpected.

Battle royale

So… what do YOU do when you are stuck at home all day? And it is raining? And COLD outside?

Bear in mind, I have five teenagers. Count them. FIVE. Three of them are boys. And their teenage hormones get the best of them on a regular basis and my usual recourse is to send them outside until they get it out of their system. But today, since I don’t want to risk them getting sick, I let them wrestle and play shoulders and whatever else they do IN THE HOUSE. Not to worry, tomorrow they get lessons in patching drywall.

The girls are less violent physically but more so verbally. Holy. Mac. And. Cheese. Who know that simple, innocent statements could take on so many barbed nuances with a tone, a raised eyebrow, a nod, a curled lip…? I swear they are harder on my nerves than the young bulls tearing up the living room and throwing each other over the couches.

The boys are best friends after their knock down drag out. They giggle like a cheer squad sleepover while they are ramming each other into walls and picking each other up like sacks of potatoes. But the girls, after their verbal jousts, just get cattier. Meaner. More angst-y. Is that a word? I dunno, now it is.

My hero is off work today and we are just hanging out. Something that we NEVER get to do. We set up his new phone (a Valentine’s Day present from me. So we rushed a little getting it up and running). Watching the mayhem and scoring the plays. (Wow, that single leg takedown was a 10, don’t you think?) I am fighting feeling completely lazy and useless- mommy guilt pulling against the immense enjoyment of just being with my best friend. And you know what? My best friend wins.

Our oldest daughter fixed supper. Our baby is bouncing around terrorizing his older siblings. That little boy knows he is the biggest, baddest cat on the block. He can even whip our 17 year old. The Great Dane and our little mutt terrier started off wrestling with the boys, grew tired, and are now hiding in our bedroom with us, observing from a distance.

Have you ever had that feeling, when you are in a moment, that that moment will be with you forever? I have that now. This picture of our children bonding during COVID-19 lockdown, me and my hero cuddled up and showing each other interesting YouTube videos… this time is challenging but so good. I sincerely hope that you and your family are weathering the invisible storm well! And that you stocked up on a sense of humor even more than toilet paper. Because I don’t think I have ever needed mine as badly as I do this second. And now, excuse me while I go make my young bulls clean up the living room and put the furniture back…

April Fools

Hmmm. Being housebound on April Fool’s Day forebodes… mayhem. Especially since my hero is in the house. His stage name is The Shenanigator. Today will be a play by play of the madness- this is a developing story, so I will post tonight.

It actually started last night, with our 15 year old daughter. She grew weary of her brothers sneaking goodies when no one was looking, and asked if she could make a special batch of cookies. A REALLY special batch of cookies. A batch of cookies with a few tablespoons of baking soda in them. Predictably, one of the boys snagged a cookie first thing this morning, chomped a big ol’ chomp, chewed… and his face froze. In a grimace. He swallowed hard and then said “She sucks! Those cookies are awful!” My hero and I died laughing. I regretted not having my camera ready. He figured out he had been pranked. April Fools!

He was not to be outdone. Having been assigned to make pancakes for breakfast (which he does really well), he turned his attention to the food. After his morning hygiene routine which included cleaning ears with Q-tips, he received his inspiration. A clean Q-tip made it into his pocket and into the kitchen with him… and oops… into the pancakes. He saved that special pancake specially for the cookie maker, but his older sis came along. Being a properly bossy older sister, she insisted on having THAT pancake. NOW. He told her she didn’t want that one, but she insisted. And nagged. And pouted. So he gave her the pancake. She was duly impressed. Pucker face, gagging, WHAT IS THAT????!?! To add to the joke, my hero and I promptly jumped on the pancake maker’s case about cleaning his ears while he was cooking and how disgusting that is… April Fools!

The baking soda prank continued… our pancake chef decided to load the middle of a pancake with baking soda. One sister grabbed the biggest, fattest pancake and proceeded to dust it with “powdered sugar” (baking soda actually)… and lick her lips in anticipation of the tasty treat. Oblivious to her parents and brother watching with bated breath around the corner, she sliced off a huge mouthful… and chomp… and choke. It was hilarious. Gagging, spitting… she briefly lost her sense of humor and murder flashed in her eyes. Until…

Her Daddy put evil ideas in her head. The littlest shenanigator needed to go potty. He needed someone to wipe his bottom. Sister kindly helped, and melted chocolate chips ended up on her hand… and on pancake brother’s back… “Eeewwww! He made a mess!” April Fools.

The Three Amigos (smallest 3 boys) were not to be outdone. They placed land mines made from mouse traps and trip wires. Only problem was they forgot where they put them and ran into their own traps. Which was even funnier.

Apparently it was a food prank day. Because one diabolical child of mine who shall remain unnamed decided it would be a grand idea to hollow out a couple of Tootsie Rolls, fill the void with Tabasco sauce, carefully rewrap the candy, and bribe a small brother to do her chores with said spiked candies. Fortunately he was one who likes spicy food, but the unexpected modification to his eagerly anticipated treat was less than impressive. (We gave him some good ones afterwards)

We got busy building a greenhouse, and forgot about pranking each other for the rest of the day. The next morning one of the Three Amigos sighed dramatically, “I survived! It isn’t April Fools Day any more… it’s like, APRIL SECOND!”